Finally knew the reason why you have been running huh? After all these while, you have tried to evade the issue. Finally the answer popped up surprisingly in your head. FUCKING FINALLY~!

You ought to realize why you are so bloody tired of this world eh? Realize why you are still on your feet because the scarce happy pills around you? Realize why after each fucking time of rest, you dread the present more and more? Sure, you get motivated for countless of excuses you managed to make for yourself.

"It's a new world everyday!"
"It's okay staying like this. It's going to be alright!"

Yeah, fuck you. All optimism parts of you. You are tired because you ran after people, relentlessly. You didn't want to be left behind. You didn't want to be alone. So you ran with all you had, chasing, nearly begging them to stay with you. The thing is this - you threw away the only fucking thing you held on from the past. The only thing you ever know and possess. Your individual, girl. That's right, you threw away yourself. It's not about those that might be behind you. It's you.
You ran and ran, too afraid to stop and be left out. You are too much of a coward to stand alone in the dark. Because it makes you feel insecure right? Because it reminds you of those fearful feelings you once had?

You have got to stop... You are not a kid anymore. You have to stop looking for supporting pillars. You have to stop running after their backs. I know you will feel scared. I feel scared too. But remember those nightmares of dependency? Remember how when someone withdraws and you found yourself in a dark hole without lights? It is going to happen again and again. They won't be around as much as they would admit.

So stop chasing. Stand by yourself because you will die like you were born, alone.